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William Jud

Desperately Seeking Nobody
By William Jud
Mar 19, 2010 - 12:27:17 AM

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I'm searching for THE GOOD LIFE.

I want the best consumer goods, the finest foods, the lowest prices, the highest income, the finest clothes, the fun-est vacation trips.

Information abounds. I know just where to go and who to see to improve my station in life. Directions are in every magazine, every newspaper, blaring from every radio and television.

I'm trying to find NOBODY but I can't ever seem to get there.

The theme song of one of the James Bond films tells me "Nobody does it better." So if I want an 'It' upgrade, I need to find Nobody to do the job.

The local big-box retail stores advertise "Nobody beats our prices -- NOBODY!" I need cheaper but acceptable quality merchandise to lower my cost of living. Please show me the way to Nobody's store.

"Nobody beats our deals" claims the tire store that also advertises better prices and service than "Anybody" offers. Well, I am willing to drive past Anybody's store to get the superb tire deals that Nobody's store offers, but where is Nobody's store? I cannot find Anybody's store or Nobody's store advertised in the telephone directory or the Chamber of Commerce Business Directory.

I am desperately searching for Nobody and the Good Life that Nobody offers.

If you know the way, please tell me.

William Jud

William Jud's Magic City Morning Star News Column

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