A hundred people I didn't know gathered on the top floor of a New York City hotel. A few sought fame or fortune but most were there undertaking an endeavor with the hope of making a difference, sharing their story to help others, or bringing awareness to people in need.

I sought the back of the room, nearest the exit sign, choosing a seat on the aisle. Where I sat mattered to me. So much that I'd deliberately arrived early to choose my place, recognizing this quirky aisle-sitting obsession as part of who I am. So much that even in a sparsely filled theater, I take an aisle seat.

As a child, having a fire destroy our home in the middle of the night shaped that aisle preference as certainly as my mother's DNA shaped my face. Being sick as a young woman, having a failed first marriage, being fired from my first professional job, and losing my father to Alzheimer's also shaped me. So did growing up at a time of bomb shelters, war protests, and glass ceilings, and being married thirty-two years to my best friend, experiencing the joys and challenges of motherhood, and watching lions devour their prey in Africa.

But I never thought of my life's occurrences in quite the same way until this event in New York. It was there I met a woman who lost her college-age son to suicide, now devoting her life to warning others of the signs. I met a survivor of street brutality dedicating his life to rescuing troubled teens; an accident victim told he'd never walk again who just ran his first 10k; and a man who lost 250 pounds, clawing out of his depression so he could help others defeat their demons and restore their health.

These inspirational people became who they were through their life's experiences. They got me thinking about my own. You see, every headline, every book read, every person met, every experience had or heard about - good or not so good - finds its way into how we think, what we believe, what we don't believe, and who we trust or don't trust.

Like constantly forming and re-forming DNA, these spaghetti entanglements of life shape us, inspire us, jade us, and challenge us, as they embed themselves in who we become. These blasts of experience, chance occurrences, and considered choices evolve our heads, our hearts, and our spirits.

In the scheme of things, at this reflective birthday thinking time, I started wondering: How different would I be in another time or place, or with different life circumstances? How much of who I am is a result of who I've been, where I've lived, and who I've met or not met?

T-shirt wisdom offers a philosophy I like: "No rain; no rainbow." I wouldn't be who I am today without both rain and rainbows; without being challenged, disappointed, inspired, devastated, and loved. I wouldn't be who I am without the opportunities of this century, the problems of these times, and the circumstances I sometimes face. I also know that how we evolve in times of our rain influences other people to find a way through theirs. I am grateful for that inspiration from others.

(c) 2008 Nan S. Russell. All Rights Reserved.

Nan S. Russell is the author of "Hitting Your Stride: Your Work, Your Way." More about Nan and her work can be found at www.nanrussell.com/.

Nan's free monthly eColumn at www.intheschemeofthings.com