"Fall seven times, stand up eight." -- Japanese Proverb

Those who suffer from chronic pain have a most difficult and challenging path. Generally they have had the pain for a long time, and often have tried everything to get relief. Sometimes absolutely nothing helps.

It is hard for others to imagine what it is like for these individuals. Every aspect of their lives is affected. Often it is impossible for them to get a full night's sleep. They cannot enjoy the things they used to, because the pain is always there.

The irony is that many chronic pain sufferers look completely normal. You would not know, just by looking at them, that anything is wrong. This can be a problem at home with family members, as it is easy to forget an individual is suffering when they look okay.

If someone you know has chronic pain, there are some things to keep in mind. If the person seems grumpy and irritable, it is likely because the pain is bad. Often they try not to keep talking about the pain, and not to complain. Their frustration with the pain may come out when dealing with other issues.

Chronic pain sufferers do not handle stress well. All of their energy goes into dealing with the pain. Try to avoid conflict, and not to overload them with expectations.

Offer love, affection and assistance. The pain sufferer may have reduced self-esteem because of the condition, and may feel he or she is a burden. Helping the person feel loved and valued will not reduce the pain, but it will make it more bearable.

Gwen Randall-Young is an author and award-winning Psychotherapist. For permission to reprint this article, or to obtain books or cds, visit www.gwen.ca.