I just tucked away a photo of a teen who took his life a year and a half ago. He, unmarried, had a baby to a lovely girl. There were quarrels. Things didn't get settled kindly. My teen friend couldn't take life's pressure any longer, so he jumped in front of an oncoming auto, snuffing out his handsome figure. He left a note in his pocket.
I was making copies of his photo at the local store. I explained the story behind the snapshot to another.
She said, "I have a niece who had a child out of wedlock. She was feeling so guilty she promised to marry the fellow because of the child. I explained to her that it just wouldn't work. They weren't matched for one another. So she didn't marry him, though she left him quite depressed. However, years have passed and just the other day she married. She is very happy now and the child is growing beautifully."
I thought of these young people when I read about Noelle Bush getting out of drug rehab today. What an ordeal for her. What a nasty nightmare for Jeb and Columba, too. It's crushing.
As Noelle hugged the circuit judge, grateful for his caring judicial guidance, she noted her parents smiling, saying nothing more than their smiles.
Then I thought of how a parent's heart beats so loudly in such awful but grand moments. Only those who have gone there know how loudly the heart does beat.
So it is I pictured my son yesterday marrying for the first time. He and she. I couldn't be there for the ceremony. But my wife was. And my younger daughter stood there among them, too. Also, the bride's parents were privy to the holy proceedings.
Then I thought of their child. That precious 18-month-old who took my heart away recently when she spent a week with us here in Maine. I told someone just last Monday: "She's a perfect child!"
Then I realized how absolutely stupid that sounded. But I couldn't retract it. I had already said it. So I let it go at that, knowing that the listener didn't believe me worth a twit. But I believed me. And that's all that matters right now.
So there is my son and his new bride and their child. What a mix-up life can turn on us from time to time.
Surely very little is in synch here, sometimes it is but very few times. Yet for those few times we are most happy. Therefore, Jeb and Columba are most happy with their precious daughter returning to their home. I am sure of that.
And I was happy today when seeing the grandmother of the little child whose father took his life. It was the first time I had met her; but driving by her house, I believe the Lord turned my path toward hers.
We chatted as tears came to our eyes. She showed me some photos of her daughter - the child's mother, the father - now gone from us, and their child. We were both so very sad and yet I was happy to have talked, to have shared with her my memorable times with that promising teen fellow.
My oh my. How do we get into these situations? I don't know.
Sometimes it's just breathing that does it, getting up in the morning and breathing for another twenty-four.
In typing this I was interrupted. It was a phone call from my wife. She's on the road, returning from the wedding in Pennsylvania. She told me detail. But I could picture more than she related. You see, the ceremony took place in a federal prison. My son is an inmate there. He will be released in a few weeks.
As I hung up the phone, I read again about Jeb and his family. My tears went out to them. They are happy for Noelle. I am happy for Jay. We have some really mixed up kids, don't we? But this morning we woke up, we're breathing again, and we're hugging our children to our hearts.
Why?
Because they're growing older, as we are, too. And maybe they're growing wiser in handling life's propositions. Whatever, we don't give up hope.
My hope is in the Lord God. I would have a difficult time making it if I were not grounded in my faith. So with that, we carry on.
Jeb and Columba: my prayers are with you. My heart beats with your hearts, too. May the Lord lead us all safely home someday.
J. Grant Swank Jr.
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Read: http://jgrantswankjr.blogspot.com/
