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Brian Evankovich

More Silly Politics in California
By Brian Evankovich
Mar 10, 2004 - 3:20:00 AM

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They're letting the inmates run the asylum again.

In California, that is. The state is going to need its own 12-step program. Look at what's going on in the so-called Golden State: first to let gays get married, elect yet another actor governor, and now a state senator wants to give teens the right to vote.

My name is Brian and I live in California. Please get me out of here!

Sen. John Vasconcellos, D-Santa Clara, scribbled down the idea along with three other lawmakers. They opined that the Internet, cell phones, cable TV with 500 channels of nothing to watch, and a "diverse" society make today's teens better informed than their parents.

You know somethingís fishy when somebody finally admits teens are just as smart as they think they are.

Vasconcellos' plan would give 16-year-olds a half vote and 14-year-old a quarter vote in state elections beginning in 2006. The idea is formally called "Training Wheels for Citizenship" and needs two-thirds approval by the Legislature to appear on this November's ballot.

Democrats know that teens have skulls so full of mush that they are easily swayed by bleeding-heart-feel-good propaganda, so itís a cinch theyíll vote Donkey. Vasconcllos says teens that are given this responsibility early will grow into it with gusto, eager to vote and make decisions for the United States. But how do we expect our teens to be informed when their parents aren't even informed? We have a flood of information from 24-hour cable news and right wing talk radio and numerous talking head programs and people still can't find Washington, DC and Iraq on a map. Some still canít even tell you the difference between Dick Cheney and Dick Clark.

If teens are old enough to vote, then theyíre also old enough to die for their country. So let's lower the military enlistment age, too. If teens are so sharp this shouldn't be a problem. And let's lower the drinking age. Teens can obviously handle it if they can mull over state issues, and if they learn to drink young, they'll be better drinkers in the future. It'll be good for the economy. Let's lower the marriage age; get them married and out of the house and working hard so they can have a heart attack at 45 and keep the HMOs in business.

The last thing 14 and 16 year olds think about is politics. Granted, some do (I certainly did), but the majority (the sane ones) are more concerned with cars and clothes and the opposite sex. They learn to vote by casting ballots in school elections Ė thatís enough training, and half the time they donít care anyway. Just like the real world. Letting teens vote in an official election - even a little bit - is a ridiculous idea; in a normal world this wouldn't last a New York minute. But this is California.

We're weird here. Thatís why everybody thinks California will sink into the ocean someday.

 


Brian Evankovich is 28 years old and spends his nights wondering how many licks it takes to get to the Tootsie roll center of a Tootsie pop. If you have any insight contact brianevankovich@hotmail.com


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